it is about skies.

FIVE things you wish you could say to FIVE different people right now:

1. i am utterly, completely, head over heels in love with you.
2. i’ve cried over you for a whole year.
3. let’s face it - i was nothing more than a fuck buddy to you.
4. you are a great person. i’m sorry for being flaky.
5. let’s face it - i was nothing more than a fuck buddy to you, too.

TEN things about yourself:

1. i have no idea what i am doing with my life. ever.
2. i write poetry.
3. i work 7 days a week. i always have bags under my eyes as a result.
4. i used to run. all the time.
5. i like being skinny.
6. i am timid. i wish i wasn’t.
7. i am terrible at acting on my ideas. every now & then, though, i do something crazy. like send a love letter to the boy i (love).
8. i fall too easily, & i have yet to make anybody fall for me.
   
9. i lived in london for 5 months.
10. i think about death far more than is probably normal.

SEVEN ways to win your heart:

1. look me in the eye.
2. love writing. love literature.
3. know good music.
4. play an instrument. any instrument. sing in the shower. with me.
5. play with my hair. hold my face in your two hands. let me do the same. have stubble that i can run my fingers over.
6. be incredibly spontaneous.
7. intelligence. (& good shoes too).

SEVEN things that cross your mind a lot:

1. death. i know. it’s everywhere, though.
2. money.
3. a certain someone who writes so beautifully.
4. the future. cities: new york? boston? chicago. london.
5. someone who now resides in the mountains. we once wrote letters. we once loved each other.
6. my weight.
7. the things i must be doing wrong.

FOUR things you do before you fall asleep:

1. listen to tunes.
2. brush my teeth. mouthwash [or else it doesn’t feel complete].
3. moisturize my face. vitamin E all the way.
4. read until my eyes get heavy.
5. inhale, long & deep.

FOUR things you see right now:

1. a bottle of bully hill wine. half full.
2. my phone. not ringing.
3. a long scarf.
4. an anne taylor bag with a pair of new tights inside.

THREE songs that you listen to often:

1. passion pit: moth’s wings. this song makes me feel alive and hopeful.
2. the smiths: please, please, please let me get what i want. [it’s pretty applicable].
3. bon iver: skinny love. i find this to be one of the most beautiful and heart wrenching songs i’ve ever come across.
   
   
   TWO things you want to do before you die

1. love intensely, & be loved with as much intensity in return.
2. see the grand canyon, among other places.

ONE confession:

1. i really want to go to new york city & go to sarah lawrence, & write & stop being afraid of what it might cost me.
2. also - every day, i pour the coffee & i imagine you walking through those doors, hands in pockets, smiling at me, telling me i am yours. (what would we be without wishful thinking?)

CLEARLY, i am in love. or something like that.